How am I “really” doing?

I was told by someone that I’m in denial.

That couldn’t be the farthest thing from the truth.

I am more in tune with myself than ever.  Working on recovery means that you are working on yourself every single day.  You are acknowledging your thoughts, actions and feelings and making them right.  Making yourself better.  You may have two steps forward and one step back – but as I’ve said – if I have more good days than bad, I’m winning.

That is not denial.  That is called recovery.

Denial would be me giving up, throwing in the towel and just say I’m going to try – but not really mean it.

I try so fucking hard.  Every day, every minute and every second I am working at this. I’m trying.  And that’s the best that I can do.

So, how am I doing?

Great.  I have found many resources that have helped.  Many connections I’ve bonded with.  And more importantly working at living my life again.  I remember how much I loved it without ED.  It’s amazing.

I know it’s hard to ask me how I’m doing – but don’t ever be afraid to ask.


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