He’s big. He gives you soooo much pressure. He pressures you into an illness and pressures you not to get out of an illness.
They say an Eating Disorder is about control – which I still don’t buy into. If I had this control they speak of, this would be over. I would be recovered.
They also say it’s about being a perfectionist. That, I buy into.
During recovery it’s important not to be perfect. Not to be able to recovery perfectly. Don’t expect it to be perfect. People set themselves up to be perfect every day. So when you have “set-back” you end up feeling like you have failed when in fact it’s part of the process. You will constantly feel anxious and nervous to be perfect. And than you will go back to your old behaviours when things don’t go according to plan instead of learning from them.
Don’t have expectations. Don’t try to be perfect. Be yourself. Let things happen as they are suppose to. You are your biggest fan. You are the one to support yourself, encourage yourself and reward yourself when you feel you have achieved the littlest of goals. This is your journey so you don’t need to set any expectations for anyone. You deserve to map out your recovery at the pace that works for you. I know people who support and love you want it to be quick, but it’s not their journey. There is no right or wrong way to heal. There is only your way. Whatever works for you to get through it and to get rid of ED is the way you will recover.
Stop trying to be perfect. Stop making expectations of yourself and stop accepting expectations from others. Your journey. Your goals.