I was tempted

I’m in FLA.  Me and my brothers surprised our mom for her 70th birthday.  Awesome.  It was simply awesome.  I ended up extending my trip for a week because I have some time off and figured I might as well take advantage of the break.

Part of me was scared to do it.  Being out of my comfort zone for a full week.  The other part of me was thrilled to be out of my comfort zone for a full week.

I went for a walk by myself, got a coffee at Starbucks and went into a few stores.  The drugstore for my fave candy – NIPS.  They didn’t have!  Devastating.  I won’t lie to you, I walked to the laxative aisle.  I looked at them, I picked them up, I priced them out.  What a bargoon.  But I put them down.  I have been feeling bloated and uncomfortable in my skin as my body tries to readjust itself.  I know exactly how I could get rid of that feeling.  It would be simple.

But it would change everything.  Again.  I promised not to bring ED into 2017 – and I can’t.  I knew that as I stood there with the bottle of poison in my hand.  I couldn’t.  I wouldn’t and I didn’t.

How did I feel when I left?  Relieved that ED remained in 2016.

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