Everyone is proud of me, but am I proud of me?

My big little brother never wants birthday gifts. He always asks people to donate money to various charities.  This year he chose: http://nedic.ca/ – so with pleasure I donated.

When he received the donation he emailed me:

I’m glad you are doing better Lex.  Keep looking after yourself.  I want you to finally be proud of yourself.

How powerful.  I know people are proud of me and what I am trying to do.  But (and no offence), that all doesn’t matter if I’m not proud of me.  So when I thought about what he wrote I wondered: Am I proud of me?  The ups and downs and trials and tribulations are exhausting.  But it’s a path to get to the end, right?

I’ve listened to this song many times, but never really focused on the words.

It’s a great motivator for anyone trying to achieve a goal.

“Try Everything”
I messed up tonight, I lost another fight
I still mess up but I’ll just start again
I keep falling down, I keep on hitting the ground
I always get up now to see what’s next

Birds don’t just fly, they fall down and get up
Nobody learns without getting it wrong

I won’t give up, no I won’t give in
‘Til I reach the end and then I’ll start again
No I won’t leave, I wanna try everything
I wanna try even though I could fail
I won’t give up, no I won’t give in
‘Til I reach the end and then I’ll start again
No, I won’t leave, I wanna try everything
I wanna try even though I could fail

Try everything

Try everything

Try everything

Look how far you’ve come, you filled your heart with love
Baby you’ve done enough, take a deep breath
Don’t beat yourself up, don’t need to run so fast
Sometimes we come last, but we did our best

I won’t give up, no I won’t give in
‘Til I reach the end and then I’ll start again
No I won’t leave, I wanna try everything
I wanna try even though I could fail
I won’t give up, no I won’t give in
‘Til I reach the end and then I’ll start again
No I won’t leave, I wanna try everything
I wanna try even though I could fail

I’ll keep on making those new mistakes
I’ll keep on making them every day
Those new mistakes

Try everything

Try everything

Try everything

Try everything


It’s true isn’t it?  We all try to do things and sometimes we achieve them, and other times we fail.  The two lines that really resonated with me were:

Nobody learns without getting it wrong

I wanna try even though I could fail

In the documentary THIN (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GV3L0v2tNzo) I have written about before, one girl says something that is so completely heartbreaking and goes against everything that is said in the song Try Everything.

“So be it.  I want to be skinny.  So if it takes dying to get there, so be it.”

How awful is that?  She is willing to die (a single mom, with two young kids) to be thin.  In her mind, being thin is worth everything.  It’s not worth life, it’s worth death.

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