I’m not doing anything!

I can’t wait to be me again.

I miss me.

Lisa.

The person I am, the person that is hiding.

I am all there – just part of me is being held back by ED.  I won’t allow him to take away everything so I hold on to the part of me that I refuse to let go of.  I miss it.

It will come back.  It will resurface.  And that Lisa will be back as a whole person.

Right now I’m not a full person.  I’m part Eating Disorder.  And I don’t like that title.

I bumped into a friend today at the mall who I haven’t seen in years.

“Oh, you are withering away.  Please don’t do that to yourself.”  I told her I am trying not to.

What I wanted to say was…

I wish you understood. I’m not DOING anything to myself.  This is a mental issue.  I am trying – but this disease is something you won’t get.  I’m glad you won’t ever be able to relate to me.  But please know – I am not DOING this.  It’s DOING it.

I’m unDOING it.

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