I will NEVER give up

Read this article and emailed the writer.  I was so touched.

Being “The Girl with the Eating Disorder”

Today a case worker from the CCAC is coming to meet with me at lunch.  They offer resources to people and have “shlep” that I don’t.  She asked about what I have been doing and what I have not been doing.  I told her how hard I have been trying and how the system is literally failing me.  She was upset and knows how things work.  She mentioned a program that shockingly I didn’t know about.  We are going to discuss it in further detail today.

My dietician and I have been on opposite schedules, it’s been difficult.  So it’s been a couple of weeks since I have seen her.  The woman from CCAC said she will set me up with someone for 6 weeks.  GREAT.  They can even come to my house in the evenings.  Perfect!

I will keep trying.  I will keep calling.  I will continue to leave messages.  I will go see Mina and Dr. Courbassan.  I won’t give up.  Because by giving up, I allow ED to win.

A great part of the article was how she said you are so angry.  And it’s true.  I’m so pissed.  This is not my path.  This is certainly not my destiny.  But instead of being angry at this or that, the programs, the people – be angry at what got you here.

SO, SCREW YOU ED.  You will not win this fight.  I promise you that.  I am going to make you suffer the way you have made me suffer.  By not allowing you to live my life any more.  I refuse, refuse, refuse to let you win.

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